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Elizabeth Reninger

Gazing With Braco

By October 19, 2010

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A couple days ago I participated in a live-stream event with the Croatian healer (who-doesn't-call-himself-a-healer) Braco. There were two sessions, one of which I viewed on my personal computer, the other of which I viewed with a group, on a large screen in a public venue.

Both times, after fifteen or twenty minutes of introductory material, Braco entered the room (which for those of us tuning in remotely was simply our screen), gazed for somewhere between five and ten minutes, then left. Not a word spoken, simply gazing while emitting a truly delicious energy.

Since I haven't yet experienced Braco in person, I can't offer a comparison between in-person and live-streaming experiences. What I can say is that the live-stream, for me, was quite powerful, with its effects still clearly reverberating.

In noticing these effects, I've been reminded, once again, of some of the basic principles of qigong practice -- in particular the part about how old unresolved experiences create blockages in the meridians. As I wrote in my essay How Qigong Works:

"In the course of our lives, when we have experiences that we're not able, in the moment, fully to digest, the energy of those experiences - like undigested food in our intestines - creates blockages in the meridians ... Qigong practice helps us to untie these energetic knots, allowing energy/awareness to once again flow freely in and as the Present Moment: a luminous emptiness in which the play of our bodily elements continuously unfolds."

My bodymind responded to the energy of Braco's gaze in much the same way as it does to a deep qigong practice (or acupuncture session, or meditation retreat). First, I noticed a sweet and potent awakening of flowing energy within my bodymind: Parts of my body that were so asleep that I didn't even know they were asleep began to wake up.

I experienced the energy as moving from place to place, sometimes an intense tingling/buzzing sensation, at other times just a subtle infusion of spaciousness, a release of tension into ease and quiet wakefulness. Sometimes it felt like a shower from above, at other times like a welling up of a fountain from some source deep within.

Occasionally I'd attempt to notice which specific meridians were being affected, but mostly just remained in a deeply receptive mode, doing my best to keep conceptual analysis to a minimum. When the gazing was complete, I sat quietly for several more minutes, soaking in its effects.

Later that evening, right as I was drifting off to sleep, I experienced a kind of dislodging and release of a rather large piece of unconscious material (aka a blockage in the meridian system), in the form of a visual/emotional "memory" (to what extent the event depicted "really happened" I have no idea, nor does it really matter, in relation to the process of opening/balancing the meridians).

I was already in bed, the lights were out so it was dark in the room. What arose then on my internal screen was an image of (what I assumed to be) a younger "me" who was resisting a physical attack of some sort. Initially, I both saw the hands and arms of this younger me (as though looking at "my" hands and arms) and, at the same time, experienced a rush of strong emotions, fear mostly.

Though I felt quite close (a sense of claustrophobia even) to the scenario as it began to play out, I also was able to maintain my witness -- that rememberance that I was, in a sense, in a theatre, just watching a movie -- and understood the process to be a kind of cleansing and opening that was, in the big picture, a really good thing.

At a certain point in the scenario, there was a dissociation -- an "escape" into identification with and perception via a body more subtle than the physical. The experience now was one of being very close to the ceiling -- close enough to reach out with my hand (though there were no hands, visually, in the picture at this point) and touch it. This to me was the most interesting aspect of the clearing, because at this point it wasn't immediately clear whether it was the the present-time "me" or the from-the-past-movie-"me" (granting, for the moment, the distinction :) whose subtle-body perception I was inhabiting.

How I figured this out, in that moment, was to remember that the ceiling in the room in which my present-time body was resting had a distinct texture to it -- popcorn-like; while the ceiling that was appearing on my visual screen was quite smooth and flat in its texture. So at that point I knew that what I was seeing was the ceiling within the memory. Once again, while I was quite close and even -- in relation to perception -- "within" the memory as it cleared, there was still an awake witnessing capacity that remained continuously online.

Though it's taken me a good twenty minutes now to describe this, the scene as it unfolded probably lasted no longer than two minutes. As it completed, I opened my eyes, and noticed again a sweet flow -- even more pronounced -- through the meridians that earlier in the day had been awakened via Braco's gaze. And some sense of a deep level of tension having just been released; and an internal reorganization -- a re-calibration of my bodymind in relation to the new opening/balancing.

I imagine that most of you have experienced similar releases, in relation to energetic openings associated with your qigong, martial arts and/or meditation practice. Yes? What felt so unique about this one, as I said, was that it was catalyzed simply by the silent gaze of a man via internet live-streaming -- whose physical body was upwards of a thousand miles from mine. Pretty cool, I say.

From what I understand, Braco's organizers are working to be able to offer increasing numbers of live-stream events. If you feel at all drawn to this kind of thing, I really encourage you to experience at least one of them. It's quite a profound gift, being offered basically free-of-charge.

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